Sunday, April 24, 2011


There comes a time
when the yellowest part of you
rusts gently at the edges, and you can just feel it happening.
My time came years ago, when Roxy reopened...

You see, Roxy was all the rage, and they never checked I.D.
Gina and I....we had a plan, and there was no way we could be stopped.
Dipped in the yellow of youth, and doused in Exclamation. We just knew we would get in.

Dance moves ready and hair sprayed to oblivion. Shhhhh. "Abuela is doing the rosary,it won't be long now until she is fast asleep." -And out the door we will slip, into the inky black night, and the smoke filled chambers of the nightclub. Chelsea Piers, we are on our way. Gold hoops loop at our necks and eyeliner is our war paint... and we have never felt so grown in our lives.

This is our chance. We are going to take back the night,no pills, no counting, no IV's. No nurses telling us what to do. At Roxy, Gina can blend into the crowd.. She doesn't have to be sick, she doesn't have to be a patient. She can be Queen Gina, goddess of Reggae, Spice Girls afficianado, and Menudo's number one fan.. and I, I can be her sidekick. I don't have to be the one who makes sure she doesn't skip a dose. I don't have to be the one to tell her "No, You can't do that." You're too sick. You're  too delicate.- And so tonight. We are gonna let it all go. Tonight, we are gonna forget the rules and make our own.

But when I get back from the restroom... Gina is crying...because her hair was falling out, and even though I covered it with a headband, she knew it was there. She said the room was tilting, and I said, "No, the world is." and though she still wanted to go to Roxy I said, "No, you can't."

I got into bed with her right then, and she said "Sing to Me?".. "Tupac?" I joked. "No, Landslide" she replied....

A week later she was gone. I looked around the room at all the Lipsmackers and Pogs and wondered, "Why did I have to be the one to say no?" I think back to the time I caught her with a cigarette and snatched it straight out of her hand. "You can't!" I yelled. Her eyes glared at me, "Could you stop yelling? My friends are watching!" she replied as if I was the wrong one and I never understood....

The other day I came across the word "cant" C-A-N-T. Defined as: "The thrust or motion that causes a slant or a tilt" and it hit me... all those times she complained that the room was tilting, it was because she was living in "CANT", and I wish I could take it all back now. I want to tell her that she could have gotten that tattoo, and that she could have gone night swimming, and that she could have stayed out past her curfew... and that I am sorry...but I can't. I want to tell her that she deserves to go to Roxy and that dancing...dancing will help with the nausea, and laughing? laughing will help with the pain. I want her to know that "CANT" was the only way I knew how to protect her, but now, now it all makes sense. The tilts, the slopes, the landslides.... and now, because of her, I live my life on the horizon declining all implications of "CANT". I want to run screaming through the gates of heaven yelling "I can! I can! and you can too!!!" and I would hope that she would hear me. I would hope that she would run to me and say..." Thanks Tiff, for the support and all, but could you stop yelling? my friends are watching".

Thursday, April 14, 2011

The Grandeur of God.

This photo invokes one of my favorite poems by Gerard Hopkins:

THE WORLD is charged with the grandeur of God.
It will flame out, like shining from shook foil;
It gathers to a greatness, like the ooze of oil
Crushed. Why do men then now not reck his rod?
Generations have trod, have trod, have trod;
And all is seared with trade; bleared, smeared with toil;
And wears man’s smudge and shares man’s smell: the soil
Is bare now, nor can foot feel, being shod.

And for all this, nature is never spent;
There lives the dearest freshness deep down things;
And though the last lights off the black West went
Oh, morning, at the brown brink eastward, springs—
Because the Holy Ghost over the bent
World broods with warm breast and with ah! bright wings.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Fashion Faux Pas Friday

Okay. It's Fashion Faux Pas Friday. Today we will talk about the monstrosities of fashion crime that are committed every day by women and men everywhere. Whether it's a close friend, a relative, or you.... we must take the steps as loyal citizens to ensure that these crimes come to a stop immediately. Without further ado,

Platform Heels.

I am not sure when these things made a comeback, but I am just counting the days until they go away. Don't get me wrong, while I adore a nice heel and wear them often, these spiky, stacked, clunky pieces of stripper wear are just plain scary. Heels that tower over 3 inches tall or not only tacky, but unhealthy for your feet and spinal cord, and let's face it can't walk in them! I see women everywhere wobbling and teetering forward on these things. Not cute. So unless, you are a supermodel, or have the legs of a goddess, Let it go.

Low Rise Jeans

Self Explanatory. There is no reason to show off all the inventory like this.

For the love of God, pick up your pants! There is not a woman on God's Green Earth, that thinks this is cute. It is very 1991,and please..don't try to be contemporary by doing it with skinny jeans.

This is an appropriate look, in my opinion

Leopard Print.

Some people are taking this trend way too far. While I adore a little leopard lining, or maybe a leopard clutch, head to toe leopard is a bit aggressive. Save it for the Amazon.

Tacky Nails.

Scary. How do you type, dial a phone, or wipe your er-- bottom properly?? Overly long, acrylic nails limit dexterity, and compromise nail health. Acrylic nails can cause serious damage if broken,and also fosters an environment for bacteria and fungus to breed. So I encourage you to go natural. If you really can't stand the thought of sporting your natural nails, get them at reasonable lengths. Also, I think nail designs should be limited.

Designer brands

Owning a quality designer handbag is nice. Idolizing a designer is not. Head to toe Coach, Gucci, ..e.t.c... is not cute. Never has been. What is so fantastic about a bunch of C's or G's on a bag anyway? Paying upwards of $300.00 for a handbag or pair of shades because it has a bunch of C's on it is ridiculous. The same thing goes for T-shirts that cost $48 bucks and just read "Aeropostale". Where is the quality there? Why is it so important to people, to have labels stuck all over them? Does it make your life more fulfilling? No? It just makes you broker than you were before, with an ugly shirt too. Oh, and knockoffs...well, you know better than that.

C'mon Guys...

I don't get it. Not unique, due to the masses of people wearing them,they look quite silly, and you get bonus dingbat points if there are no lenses in them. If you own a pair of these, you may be suffering from Tryingtooharditis. It's okay, we have all been there.

So that's it for today, stop by next Friday to help combat these Fashion Faux Pas and make the world a better place. What other fashion faux pas can you think of? Comment below!